Dating with psoriasis

Posted Thu 24 Jan 2019 18.08 by Willowg

Hi, it's my 1st message on here. I have suffered for nearly 20 yr . I am 38 now, and struggle with dating due to the condition . When it gets to 2nd , 3rd date I end relationship due to been embarrassed. Does anyone know of dating sites in UK, Yorkshire that have members with same conditions ?? Thanks

Posted Thu 24 Jan 2019 18.18 by OhNo_NotAgain?

Persoanlly I would have thought you would be better off finding someone who likes YOU and can see past your psoriasis. If you are reaching a 2nd or 3rd date it sounds as if you are managing to find and date people who are not put off . . . why are you allowing it to get in the way in that case? To get together with another sufferer just on the basis of both being sufferers, does not sound healthy to me. But then, what do I know?

Posted Fri 25 Jan 2019 17.53 by cazzie

hi there. I totally get what you mean on the 1st and 2nd date everything is ok maybe if lucky could get a little peck but as soon as a cuddle comes its "oh no don't touch my skin …. don't let the flakes drop out of my sleeve.... nope that's not a black burse on my eyelid its red and sore skin under make up.... it becomes such a mountain to explain and when do you explain ???? I have some hurtful things said to me over the years and they all cut deep and then when I really fancy someone there goes the nagging doubt again.... what is the point go to bed with clingfilm and a book might be lucky with a hot chocolate ……. 48 yr old and it don't get any easier with the looks and comments just loud enough for me to hear..... xx

Posted Fri 10 Jan 2020 09.27 by Rich

Hi Cazzie I completely agree with you how or when do you tell a date you have psoriasis it's impossible I am desperate to meet people with psoriasis so I don't feel alone anymore....

Posted Wed 15 Jan 2020 20.03 by Dorothy

You need to find someone who loves you for yourself, psoriasis and all! After all, you could get together with someone, maybe marry, start a family and then one of you could develop another health condition - are you going to end the relationship then, because you no longer have 'matching' health issues? No one knows what the future holds, so if you want a lasting relationship, you need someone who will stick with you regardless of what life throws at you. And that kind of person isn't going to be put off by psoriasis. And they are out there. I was single for 20+ years, and 2 years ago, I met someone who loves me for who I am, not for what I look like or how healthy (or not) I am. So don't give up.

Posted Fri 17 Jan 2020 23.07 by Bubblefish

I've grown up with varying degrees of psoriasis. Yes it's put people off, not many but at the time it broke me in 2 however now I see how shallow they were. I've been in my current relationship 10 years, we started as friends much longer ago, so no secrets as to what I have, let's be honest it's often obvious! He's applied creams to my back, run me salt baths, hugged me when I feel like sh!t and always says he sees past it. That doesn't mean I don't feel embarrassed or insecure. That's not through anything he does but more I question why he wouldn't want someone 'perfect'. Good people are out there, if they like you for the person you are and qualities you have then they shouldn't be put off. Don't assume that they'll run a mile, you never know what they may be concealing health-wise, let them get to know you and then mention it. I had numerous relationships over the years and I would mention it if it didn't come up already on the second or third date. I do hope you find happiness. Helen

Posted Tue 21 Jan 2020 14.21 by Dorothy

"now I see how shallow they were" This! I've actually come to see it as an advantage in a bizarre way. If people are going to be put off by psoriasis, they're not the kind of people I really want or need in my life anyway. In a way, having a health issue or other problem that may 'put people off' either being your friend or having a romantic interest in you is a good thing, as it filters out timewasters and shallow people!

Posted Sat 25 Jan 2020 12.14 by HPBug

Hi, I've had psoriasis since the age of 20 and am now 38 so I do know how you feel, I went through the same when I was dating. It was always in the back of my mind that people would find it off putting and it really knocked my confidence. If someone is worth having and worthy of you and a decent person, they will see past it. My husband did. The psoriasis does not define you and people who think it does are not good enough for you. If they truly like you and enjoy your company, the psoriasis shouldn't even come into it. Hayley

Posted Sat 25 Jan 2020 16.34 by Mac

Hi Willowg. Feelings are hard to change/keep in check, so we all do or try to do what's right. If you where getting to 2nd and 3rd dates there must have been something there, was it right to drop your date on the chance they wouldn't like psoriasis. Personally I would have thought it was a good way to see if love was really there. I would agree with what OhNo_NotAgain posted. I think the road you where on was a much healthier one than one your considering. Some times you just have to give people a chance, you could be surprised.

Posted Mon 27 Jan 2020 15.03 by ArranDp

Hi Willowg I'm a 43 year old man with psoriasis too, and have had similar experience to you except that ladies have made up excuses (I think!) before to end with me when my condition is actually the reason. You know what, their loss! I gave up worrying about it a long time ago now. Anyone who can't see beyond it is a shallow individual indeed. Try and date with confidence, because any real man who is truly keen on you will not be worried one little bit about your condition. If I hear of any psoriasis dating services I will post here straight away. Might even give it a try myself too....... All the very best to you in the meantime, and chin up! Regards, Arran, Kent. X

Posted Mon 27 Jan 2020 15.26 by ArranDp

...postscript to my last message. I can't find any specific dating sites for people living with psoriasis unfortunately. All links I found just led to offers of smut! Shame. Hope it works out for you very soon. Arran. X

Posted Tue 28 Jan 2020 22.47 by tes (edited Tue 28 Jan 2020 22.49 by tes)
Psoriasis warrior of 20 years. I have three young children. Too many flare ups to count. Body confidence 100%

I’ve had psoriasis for 20 years, I found someone while having a flare up and met him through a dating site and he didn’t care about what I looked like. I have been with him for 6 years and have 3 kids together. You need to find someone who accepts you for you and not what you look like. Confidence is key! You shouldn’t care what people think as long as you love yourself then everything will fall into place.

Posted Thu 30 Jan 2020 02.40 by newtothis

Hi Please just be upfront about it. I've just started dating a guy with psoriasis arthritis and even though it was via a dating website he told me upfront. I knew what psoriasis was but had never knew it was attached to arthritis so I had the opportunity to google and research before ever meeting. To be honest, the skin side of it is not a problem for me and I appreciated his candour. Tell potential dates upfront, they are not worth their salt if they are that easily put off and it gives people time to digest and understand your condition without any pressure xx

Posted Sun 9 May 2021 19.59 by ashish684
Dealing with psoriasis from 2006

Hello, I am dealing with psoriasis for last 15 odd years and recently, we have launched a dating app for people with chronic skin conditions including psoriasis, vitiligo, and others. The app name is DermaCupid. The Android app has been launched on 21st April 2021 on google playstore. You can download the dating app from the website www.dermacupid.com. The iOS will be launched in coming 2-3 months time. Hope, this app will give an opportunity to explore dating opportunities in a judgement-free zone where the skin condition would not be a deal breaker. Also, its an inclusive app- open to people without a skin condition if they are open to the idea of dating someone with a skin condition

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